Photo by Sergey Zolking from UNSPLASH

A syndrome of hiding behind busy-ness

Malibongwe Sithelo

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The only way nowadays to shut people away is to put your headphones on as if you’re listening to something. Even if nothing is on people will see the need to ask for your permission to converse. When your friends including your partner if you are not single anymore ask why sometimes you have a tendency to not answering their calls. One of the words that come up immediately, “Oh I was busy.” We believe you and move on.

Stop bragging about being busy, you were not supposed to be idle in the first place. Work is work for a reason. It is there for someone to get things done. You can skip that word on the dictionary but you’ll be still be required to be useful in one way or another in life. For you to be productive you have to take action in every plan, the task at hand. That is why there is also tea time, breaks in between. I know some of your motivational speakers emphasize the fact that you have to start working the moment you come until you finished. Fair enough some work needs to be done.

In life there in no time, you don’t have anything to do. When you decided to do nothing on your day off, that’s actually an activity. You allow your mind to do its job properly without interruptions. It is working before you even take a nap. There will never enough time to do anything at all. Time is like money, it is never enough. You will always be busy. All you need to do stop hiding behind ‘busy’. I think if you are ever busy making time for your partner, kids, family including coffee with your colleagues once in a while, you have a syndrome.

The syndrome of inability to prioritize and delegate. That is a problem. When I was running a tuckshop, I had to call my friend Terry to come and work with me. I’ve known her for years and began to entrust her in many things. My daughter was also another person who’s sort of a freelancer in helping me on weekends. The reason being is that I had other things to do. I had a job 9–5 kinda. But I was working shifts. The tuckshop I know is small to hire people but it was done properly because more than one hand was involved. There are things you cannot excel in doing but if you were to delegate things could have been better. What you cannot do in two hours someone else can do it in 2 minutes. That is possible.

Stop hiding behind busy-ness, get help if you are a slow learner to avoid underperformance. You will never get enough time even if you were to postpone taking a dog for a walk, your child for a school event, visiting your grandma. The only thing you will see is you being a lone ranger not enjoying your wealth because of no loved ones around. In fact, you don’t have a family. The next thing we hear you attempted suicide because of depression. Time will never enough so you have to make it for everything. Make time for everything and everyone close to your heart the same way you make money.

People always want to look ambitious and working hard by playing with words, “can’t you see I’m busy”, “I am busy, I hustle.” Stupid man, that is very pathetic. I say that out of the experience. I used to think if you shut everything, everyone, and focus on my work throughout the week, I will be very very rich. No, I wasn’t. I had to do simple things, just prioritize. Do what I said I’ll do. If it means to have a day of doing nothing, sleep enough then so be it. I realized I also have the energy to run, exercise, read, and call other people close to my heart if I made time to rest and sleep.

I am not a fan of Joel Osteen but I remember one time he mentioned in one of his sermons that his father was good at making time for the family. His late father John Osteen was an evangelist and founder of one of the biggest Churches in America. What’s interesting was the fact that Joel said his father would get calls from in need of prayer, but he’ll use the same phrase ‘I’m busy” meanwhile he was just hanging around his kids and wife. Doing absolutely nothing, or taking them out for a walk. I liked the attitude his father had. What we do in our spare time is also work, whether is just out for ‘fish and chips” if you are a Capetonian with your friend, sister, or brother.

Stop hiding behind busy. If you have lot’s to do delegate. There are things you are not good at, your nephew can easily do quicker. You don’t have to do all the chores the whole day, your neighbour can help you clean the yard and car only if you ask of course with reciprocity. You will never know until you ask.

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Malibongwe Sithelo

I'm a freelance writer, a runner and a public servant in South Africa. I write about everyday life experiences.