Photo by Anh Nguyen on Unsplash

Stuff happens

Life is not certain and not everything you have planned works according to the plan. I am not into the idea of the New Age Movement, the law of attraction. The myth that whatever happens to you is because attracted to your life. Their point is you are the one who went to the bank and ask for a loan. Therefore, you are responsible. Fair enough. High interest over your neck is what you have attracted. But what if you were facing life and death and your credit record is good? Let’s leave New Age Movement out of this, back to the topic. In whatever happens in Sudan, both South and North are just unfortunate. The abduction of the girls in Nigeria a few years ago in also not so acceptable. Do parents of those kids attracted that? No. Stuff happens.

I am also not into the idea that ‘everything happens for a reason.’ I’d rather say most things happen for a reason. Lessons to be learned are always not in our ideal way of hope. You learn most of the things the hard way. It is similar to capturing everything in your brain faster. When you are slow in catching everything in class it is possible that will take time to get out of your memory. Whatever you have learned the hard way, it is difficult to forget. One of the most difficult times in life is losing a loved one. An unexpected relationship breaks up and being dumped is weird. It all happens when you least expect it. That is life. You do good to almost everyone. What happens next? No award for that and you shouldn’t expect one. Instead very few care about your own well-being except yourself.

Depression is real. What happens when you have been available to everyone in need of help yet no one seems to care how are you keeping up. No one among all the people you rescue comes back to at least make you feel you're worth something and say a simple thing, thank you. One lecturer doctor committed suicide. We don’t know the main reason it was all personal to him. One can imagine he was so very helpful to almost everyone who needed help. The #FeesMustFall movement worked partially because of his help at the University of Cape Town. Those who knew him said he was down to earth and seem to be the coolest lecture to seek help from in the entire University. I can only imagine he might have gone through trying to figure out how come that no one seems to care how is he coping. At some point, I cannot blame people when everything seems to be working for you. The wrong thing about it is to assume that we are all fine. What was his reward for all the hard work? Nothing. But only to take his life.

We are in the middle of a pandemic. No one ever saw it coming. Maybe no one was aware it could spread throughout the world. Whether it was an experiment from a lab in China or from animal species bottom line it happened. It is still happening. Can you still say, “everything happens for a reason, after all these lives being lost on a daily basis?” In Honduras, women are being murdered by their boyfriends and strangers for reasons no one knows.

There is a trend of women being killed the most in that country. Life in the area happens, no one saw it coming and above all being murdered by loved ones. In some Mexican areas, the Cartels are almost running those places. Police officers are killed and where does one look for safety if the very own police officers are murdered? Did Mexican attract this? No. Something just went wrong beyond their control I can imagine. Do people stop living there? No. Life goes on with the hope that someday things will change.

Every day we wake up hoping for the best and all goes well, but sometimes bad. No one wakes up wishing the world can just come to an end. We still hope to get out of this pandemic. When? No one knows. The least we can do is to comply, being cautious. We are still going to be disappointed in a relationship as long as we are still humans. The thing is I don’t really know about the animal kingdom when it comes to relationships and affairs. Things happen. People who used to be intertwined and having a beautiful life tomorrow can file for divorce as far as marriage is concerned. Life has no guarantees. Just because everything goes well today, doesn’t mean tomorrow will be the land of milk and honey. Stuff happens. Everything just happens aware or unaware.

I have fallen in love with running. Not because it is easy. No, it is not. I have made it to be my hobby and also for therapy. You can always choose something else. I love it because not everyone likes it and it helps me to stay in shape, healthy and somehow physically fit. Running helps me lose focus from the problems a little bit. Helps me in doing some introspection while running. People who exercise can at least minimize stress. The benefits of running for me are it helps my blood flows and my heart to be at ease. At least I believe so. Life stresses can make you lose it. So, in as much as it happens, one can try his/her best in being active in whichever way. Maybe more sex can help. Reading can as well. I don’t know. But stuff happens. You’re already here. You might as well get used to life struggles.



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Malibongwe Sithelo

I'm a freelance writer, a runner and a public servant in South Africa. I write about everyday life experiences.